


Damaged in Our Own Ways

by Lunar_celestial



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Coming Out, Depression, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Past Sexual Abuse, Physical Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Slow Burn, Smut, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-17 23:01:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29233440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunar_celestial/pseuds/Lunar_celestial
Summary: After Eren's mother died his life seemed to always get worse. His father remarried and he and his sister were brought into a family where they meant nothing. After Mikasa moved out Eren was stuck alone in a house full of monsters. With every passing day Eren loses more and more hope and reasons to live. But Eren isn’t the only one dealing with monsters.Levi and Eren form an unlikely friendship and their relationship slowly blossoms into something unfamiliar and foreign. Will they be able to save one another or are they running against borrowed time?
Relationships: Levi Ackerman & Eren Yeager
Kudos: 2





	Damaged in Our Own Ways

Eren's eyes glazed over his empty notebook which sat opened in front of him on the small desk. Even if he was in the mood to write, he had no pencil to do so. His lanky arms draped at his sides, fingers twiddling at a loose hem on his jeans. He would have forgotten he was in class entirely but the fingers digging into his arm caught his attention "Eren? Earth to Eren?" Connie's voice snapped him back. "Maybe if we smack him he'll come back to us." Sasha chimed in. "Sasha, he's not dead." Connie said chuckling a bit. "We should just leave him." Jean scoffs, throwing his bag over his shoulder and turning his back from him. 

"Shut it, horseface." Eren said, slipping the useless notebook into his useless bag. Jean immediately spun on his heels, nostrils flaring. "How many times have I told you to stop calling me that Yeager!" he seethed. Eren just rolled his eyes, slipping out of his seat. "You better not ask me for the notes later." Jean grumbled, slipping past them and towards the door. "Who said I even wanted to ask him." Eren scoffed.

"You always do." Sasha remarked, grinning as she bounces out the door followed by Connie and Eren. "Seriously, why pay to be in college if you're not bothering to learn anything." Jean adds in. He didn't bother saying anything back, after all he was right. Although he would never tell Jean that. Even if they did attend community college the money was still coming out of his father's pockets. He really had no choice in the matter, he wasn't told he had to attend college, he was ordered to by his father. "Eren are you going to come eat lunch with us? You never go so we know you have swipes on your card! Ymir and Krista are waiting for all of us!" Sasha called back to them. Somehow she was already ten steps ahead of them, her pace increasing. She acts like the food will be gone before she gets there. 

He waved her off, heading towards the opposite direction to the exit. "I have work, maybe next time?" he flashed them a cheeky grin before disappearing through the exit before Sasha and Connie could drag him back. He had no swipes on his card because his father didn't want to pay for it and he didn't want them to know that. Money was always tight with him, even with his part time job he always struggled even if it was for the smallest purchase. He couldn't even afford his class books. Thank god Jean just thinks he's cheap.

He did not lie though, he really did have work. Just not for another hour and a half. They all knew that of course, Sasha made it her mission to come every shift he was on to get discounted goodies. He had been working at a bakery for a while now, once a cashier and now helping with baking and decorating. The only thing he was actually good at. He normally worked two shifts most days, first being early morning shifts to bake and prepare all the baked goods for the day. The second being a regular cashing shift. 

He did not want to go home before his shift, the less time at home the better for him and his mental sanity. Instead he opted to take a bus to Marley College to visit his sister before work. She had sent him a text earlier saying she couldn't see him at work today since she was caught up in exam prep but she didn't mention he couldn't visit. As he stood beside the bus stop he quickly dug for his wallet in search of his bus card. Thank god he didn't forget it today. His father's house was not a far walk from his university but Mikasa's was. A quick 15 minute bus ride could easily turn into a two hour walk down busy roads. 

The sound of screeching tires caught his attention, noticing the bus coming to a stop. A few passengers already filled the seats, luckily the left back corner was free. He quickly shuffled to the back of the bus, averting his eyes from the strangers around him. He took his old headphones Armin gave him and slipped them in, shuffling through his liked playlist before settling on one. He only gets through about four songs before the bus already reaches his destination.

He slipped out of the bus and made his way into the busy campus. It was friday nearing 12pm, most students either getting out of class or switching to the next one. Mikasa would also be leaving her class by this time, maybe he could catch her before she entered her dorm so she could let him in but of course he didn't. He waited a few minutes outside the main door, contemplating following in when students walked in or out. But he didn't want to stand outside of her dorm like a creep. 

Instead he flicked through his contacts before landing on her number and dialing it. Before he could even press it to his ear the sound of ringing emerged from further behind him, bright eyes darting to meet familiar cool gray ones. "Eren?" her head tilted slightly, strands of her straight black hair falling across the scar on her cheek. His gaze lingered there for a moment before shifting back to meet her eyes. "Hey, thought I'd stop by before I went to work." He didn't owe her an explanation, she knew how much he hated being home and used every opportunity to never be there.

She slowly moved passed him, swiping her card to open the door for him. "You know, you could have called Annie to let you in. She's there right now." Eren inwardly facepalmed himself, of course he could have done that instead of creeping around outside. He followed his sister inside, eyes roaming the bare walls of the dorm building. "Did you go to class today?" she asked as she continued to walk in front of him. There was a tone to her voice that he immediately caught. "You know I did." he said monotone. She casted a glance back at him before letting out a little huff, "Did you at least learn something?" He couldn't help but roll his eyes. "I don't appreciate you and Jean texting about me." 

"Would you rather us text about ourselves then?" "No, I'd rather you not text at all." he grumbled back but he could hear a tiny laugh escape her lips. As they approached her dorm Annie slender frame slipped out the door. "Hey Annie." He called out, causing her to look over her shoulder and just raise her hand in response before walking the opposite way. "Where is she off to?" "Probably a study session with Reiner and Berthold, we have exams coming up." Mikasa hummed, grabbing at her door handle and letting them both in. 

"Armin's coming over soon to study together if you want to stay a bit longer to say hi." she said, hanging her back next to her desk. "Nah, I shouldn't stay long. I don't want to be late for work. I just wanted to check in and see how you're doing." Part of him hated the fact that Mikasa and Armin got to attend college together without him. But they both offered to help him afford housing and tuition here in the beginning, which he politely declined. Mikasa had worked hard to save up money to leave home. She saved enough for them both to, but he would not let her waste it on him. He wanted her to live a great life and not have to stress about the past when she had the opportunity to move forward.

"Eren.." her tone shifted, sentence stumbling off before she could even start it. He never liked to see that look in her eyes, one of doubt, regret and self hatred. He never wanted her to blame herself for having to leave him behind. "Mikasa, we always talk about this. I'm fine right now. I spend most of my time at work, school, with you or friends if I can. I'm working on my savings, that way when we graduate the three of us can move in together and start a better life." He forced a ghostly grin to his lips, trying to reassure her. Although his eyes kept drifting to the scar on her face. She must have noticed because she started to play with her hair to cover it up.

"If you still leave messes everywhere there's no way you're living with me." a small grin slipped onto her face. Eren childishly pursed his lips, "You mean you wouldn't want to pick up after me?" he teased. 

She just scoffed light heartedly, shifting to her desk seat. "Do you see how neat and orderly it is in here? I could never go back to the mess you call your room." "Hey hey what seems like a mess to you is a paradise to me." he chuckled, rummaging through her snack box. "You know I could send you money for food." she frowns. He just waves her off, stealing a granola bar before glancing at the clock. "I should get going." He mumbled, food in his mouth already. He quickly shuffled over to her, leaving a soft kiss on the top of her head before heading for the door. "Don't run with food in your mouth or you'll choke!" "Worrywart!" he shouted back, jogging out the building. He nearly toppled over someone as he exited the building, "ah, Armin!" he wheezed, nearly colliding with him.

"Oh, hey Eren." the familiar blond smiled. He steadied himself, coming to a standstill beside his best friend. "Hey Armin!" he grinned. "Heard you're going to study with Mikasa? She seemed worried about me so make sure she focuses on her work." he huffed, arm moving to the back of his head to rub his neck sheepishly. The last thing he wanted was for him to interfere with her grades. "I'll try but you know she's always going to worry about you. She'll worry and study and still get a great grade." Armin responded, small smile on his lips before casting a glance at his watch. "Don't you have work soon? You're going to be late if you don't catch the bus." Armin chuckled. Of course Armin would remember that before he even would. Eren got side tracked by the smallest things. "Armin buddy where would I be without'cha! See ya!" he waved goodbye to his friend, flashing him a grin before turning the opposite direction.

He hurried out of the main campus heading towards the bus stop he arrived at. Luckily, he didn't choke on his granola bar and made it on time for his bus.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Hopefully you enjoyed the first chapter! The story will pick up pretty quickly, I just wanted to establish some baseline for the characters, where they are etc. Get ready for sad boy Eren times :(  
> If you have any questions feel free to ask!


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